on being gwyneth

Score: 100% (Alcoholic)
The Booze Test

give me whatever’s in that hypo, bones…

alison’s results for the same test as in the previous post:
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my only encounter with the scientologists was quite a few years ago, when i was offered a free personality assessment by some woman with a clipboard, in the dupont circle area. i was ushered inside, given about a half-hour’s worth of questions to fill out, and then met the evaluator, whose very first question was,” are you sure you filled out all these questions honestly?”

“of course,” i said.

“well, if that’s true, then you’re probably the most fucked-up person i’ve ever met.”

she really said that. i laughed at the time, but considering the following results from an online test, she may have been on to something:
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the code that the thing generates won’t pass my blog tool’s validation, so here’s the raw version:

You scored as Satanism. Your beliefs most closely resemble those of Satanism! Before you scream, do a bit of research on it. To be a Satanist, you don”t actually have to believe in Satan. Satanism generally focuses upon the spiritual advancement of the self, rather than upon submission to a deity or a set of moral codes. Do some research if you immediately think of the satanic cult stereotype. Your beliefs may also resemble those of earth-based religions such as paganism.

Satanism: 67%
paganism: 63%
Buddhism: 58%
atheism: 58%
agnosticism: 58%
Islam: 46%
Hinduism: 42%
Judaism: 25%
Christianity: 13%
Which religion is the right one for you? (new version)

i guess that’s what i get for being dedicated to self-determination. it does give some idea of why i find myself continually and increasingly at odds with the dominant (and i do mean dominant) monoculture.

this is not a virus i would have propagated on my own, but kathryn did insist, so:
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i don’t know if i’ve written enough about it yet, or if anyone has read closely enough between the lines, for it to be understood why this earns a Brian Blessed laugh from me:
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Which Rock Chick Are You?

[propagated via edie]

You are a GRAMMAR GOD!

If your mission in life is not already to
preserve the English tongue, it should be.
Congratulations and thank you!

How grammatically sound are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
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You are naturally born with a gift, whether it be
poetry, writing or song. You love beauty and
creativity, and usually are highly intelligent.
Others view you as mysterious and dreamy, yet
also bold since you hold firm in your beliefs.

What Type of Soul Do You Have ?
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